All human beings are also dream beings. Dreaming ties all mankind together. -Jack Kerouac
I've ridden a dragon to the moon:
Spoken to faeries with wings made of light:
I think I've even become a shadow:
These dreams were always very special to me or at least they must have been because they've stayed with me until now. But these dreams are no longer dreams to me, now they are memories.
Because one day my dreams started disappearing and now I don't see anything when I sleep.
Where did they go?
Where did my dreams go?
A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world.
- Oscar Wilde
I think this quote tells you more than I ever could, what are we without dreams? What am I? Lost is the answer and I thank Mr. Wilde for being kind enough to give it to me.
Because dreams are more than images to me, they are our souls trying to speak to us. Our subconscious trying to communicate and how can we find ourselves when we lose that? People may think that I'm being silly or exaggerating this but it's what I truly feel. The dreams that I lost weren't just the ones that I had when I was asleep...
I had dreams like this once too, but where they are now I have no idea. I can't tell you when these dreams left me, they were gone long before I realized that they were missing. If I were to describe it I would say that the feeling was rather pathetic, isn't it pathetic not to dream? Before these dreams were what filled up my future, but now the future looks more like this:
 |
| It's rather bleak isn't it? |
I hate this feeling of worry, the fear of being unsure about your future. But even worse than that, is not caring and sometimes it seems like the future doesn't matter at all to me and that's what I hate the most. When I can look at that picture above me and not care that it's my future, that's what I hate more than anything.
What can I do about it though?
Versaemerge - Clocks
"since that clocks first tick
a dark hue and fear driven lives
its only real till it ends
as the stars fall, on our heads
call the wind the thief for stealing their prayers
look at us shake the sky
pulling the whites from my eyes
and as the hands are spinning
they're waving good-bye
a test for more, is what youre striving for
as we sleep, we walk"
a dark hue and fear driven lives
its only real till it ends
as the stars fall, on our heads
call the wind the thief for stealing their prayers
look at us shake the sky
pulling the whites from my eyes
and as the hands are spinning
they're waving good-bye
a test for more, is what youre striving for
as we sleep, we walk"
I understand that I can't blame anyone else for losing my dreams, they were mine and I let them go. I'm still sad though, because now I'm wandering without knowing where I am going. It's scary and sad and sad I don't know what to do about it.
Dreams used to mean hope to me; they meant hope for the future. In a way that answers both changed and stayed the same.
If you were to ask me what I'd say now I would still say hope.
Because I hope to dream again someday.
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Credits:
http://images.fineartamerica.com/images-medium-large/dragon-moon-julie-fain.jpg
http://fc06.deviantart.net/fs8/i/2005/286/2/3/On_Wings_of_Light_We_Sail_by_nmsmith.jpg
http://www.learnnc.org/lp/media/uploads/2010/06/shadow_edit.jpg
http://moreintelligentlife.com/files/Piano.jpg
http://img.wikinut.com/img/15pqm29-6mbj7-zk/jpeg/0/Pen-and-Paper.jpeg
http://images.dexknows.com/cms/Person-icing-white-cake460x300.jpg
http://blogs.psychcentral.com/depression/files/2011/04/Black-Suede.jpghttp://moreintelligentlife.com/files/Piano.jpg
http://img.wikinut.com/img/15pqm29-6mbj7-zk/jpeg/0/Pen-and-Paper.jpeg
http://images.dexknows.com/cms/Person-icing-white-cake460x300.jpg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yIGIBytEswM
Malini, this is a very intriguing blog. I'd love to talk to you more in depth about dreams and what they mean. It's that you say your dreams have become your memories because I've come to believe that dreams are an unorganized collection of memories that come together. You're actually unable to dream of a face or image you've never seen. Those dreams about dragons and what not must have stemmed from a time when you saw those things or things very close to that somewhere on TV or something. You probably won't be able to think of that time. I'm almost positive that everyone has dreams every night, unless you have some sort of neurological disorder, but you can't remember them probably because you're so stressed out. It's impossible to remember how a dream starts. People can only remember bits and pieces.
ReplyDeleteI know that dreams are compilations of images you see during the day, I could probably even tell you what images lead to the dreams I mentioned. To me though those images represent something... Why does the brain choose those bits and pieces for our dreams? Is it random or does it mean something? I meant that I no longer remember anything from my dreams and so now dreams are only memories to me. I was attempting wordplay about the dreams we have in our sleep and those that we have about the future and how to be honest I don't have either anymore.
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